His life changed when he found out about #HIV treatment. Karl Schmid sits with activist Matt Webster.

You can read the transcript of their conversation below.

MATT
I didn’t know about treatment, about people being able to live long, healthy lives.

KARL
Hello there. Welcome to +TALK on +Life, where we’re all about turning positive into a plus. Today we’re jumping across the pond to Brighton in the UK. We’re talking to Matt Webster. Hey, Matt.

MATT
Hi, Karl, how’s it going?

KARL
It’s going very well. Thanks for asking. Nice to see you. Let’s just dive straight in. You’re a man living with HIV. Something that struck me when I was preparing for this interview, I was reading something you had posted and you said “Contracting HIV made me dismantle my own beliefs about being Poz. Now I help others do the same.” Walk me through that.

MATT
Yeah, so when I was first diagnosed in 2011, I basically knew nothing, I’d seen like, so back in the 80s, the government in the UK ran like an advert, which was basically like the word AIDS being chiseled onto a tombstone, and then the tombstone falling over, and that was kind of like one of my only bits of knowledge, about HIV is that it was, you know, a death sentence, and that was kind of how I came into my diagnosis, and that’s all I really knew, I didn’t know about treatment, about, you know, people being able to live long, healthy lives. So I kind of really worked to learn about HIV, I was reading so much and talking to you know, talking to friends, talking to doctors, just to learn as much as I could. And you know, I kind of eventually, you know, learned all the facts and all the actual truth, you know, that HIV isn’t a death sentence, and you can live, you know, a kind of a long, healthy life. And yeah, a couple years ago, so back in 2020, I went through a bit of a challenging breakup, and I’d never really kind of talked, you know, publicly about my HIV status, and that that kind of trauma, of going through that breakup really made me come out of my shell quite a lot, and that was when I started to talk, well publicly, did a few videos, which I posted online and, you know, got quite a good reaction from, you know, a lot of my friends, and people that didn’t, you know, didn’t know about my status, and, you know, from that, I kind of just picked up from there and, you know, I posted more and more videos, and pictures and things and just talked a lot more about HIV, you know, in my own community, with friends, with colleagues, and, you know, through that a lot of people started to reach out to me and talk to me about, you know, their own and experiences, their own diagnosis, so I’ve been kind of talking to people, you know, they’re going through the same thing that I did, and really just kind of helping to, you know, provide some education, a bit more understanding about, you know, what living with HIV is actually like.

KARL
Yeah, what do you think it was about that sort of traumatic breakup that made you go “This is the moment that I’m gonna kind of embrace it, I guess, and talk about it”, what do you think that was?

MATT
I think it’s difficult to kind of put into words, I was just in a very kind of dark place, when I kind of went through the breakup, and when I finally kind of started to see the light, so to speak, I just … I’d always kind of wanted to give something back, you know, to a community that had given me so much support and love, and I think just kind of going through that dark time, and kind of coming out the other end of it, I just really wanted to do something, and give something back, so I started kind of, yeah, talking more publicly, and volunteering with the local charity, as well.

KARL
I’m glad you do, and you know, you’re very vocal obviously about your HIV status on your social media. A topic that comes up and has come up is suicide, and that is a topic that I think makes a lot of people very uncomfortable. You know, I’m a little different, I kind of talk about it quite freely, rather, having lost very close personal friends to suicide, I have maybe a bit more of a controversial take on it, but, you know, tell me why it’s important for you to discuss sort of suicide, as you have, and your relationship with it, and how that relates to HIV, and why you think it’s important to have those conversations so openly?

MATT
Sure, I mean, it’s, I think it’s, it’s important to talk about mental health in general as well, I think, you know, HIV diagnosis does come with, you know, a bit of a challenge to your mental health. I think, you know, my personal experience, when I got diagnosed, was I was in that place, and I was feeling quite suicidal, and I remember sitting on the beach down here in Brighton, and was kind of like, “Well, I’m just gonna, you know, I’m just gonna, you know, I can’t deal with this, I’m just gonna kind of throw myself in the water, and that’ll be it”, but it’s really, you know, mental health is under the stigma and you know, likewise with HIV, and suicide as well, I think it’s really important that people know that they can talk about it, they can be open about it, their experiences, what they’re going through, and you know, hopefully that’ll kind of lead people to, you know, look for some support, or help, or just kind of, you know, just get that off, you know, out of their heads, out of their minds to talk about it.

KARL
Yeah, because, and as you rightly point out, an HIV diagnosis, whether it was last week, last month, 10 years ago for you, 15 years ago in my case, or even further back, is an incredibly traumatic thing to hear, and I think that’s largely because of the stigma, right? And the out-of-date information. If everyone knew what you and I know, and what the doctors know, like you equals you and all of that, do you think it would still be as much of a traumatic diagnosis for people?

MATT
I want to say no. I think it might be, you know, kind of work towards being a less traumatic experience, but I think there’s always gonna be some trauma there. I think, you know, as much as I want stigma to be completely eradicated, I don’t think it ever will, I think there’ll always be some challenge around it. So I think people who are kind of coming into a diagnosis, you know, almost thinking the worst, but you know, the more that we can educate people, maybe that’ll kind of just lessen that impact a little bit.

KARL
How do you put yourself in a position now where you can help others who are newly diagnosed?

MATT
It’s a good question. I think, you know, the fact I kind of understand a lot more about it, and there’s lot of challenges that come with it, and, you know, likewise just being in a kind of a much better, you know, mental position to kind of, you know, I obviously have my days, but you know, I’m kind of more well-equipped with the tools and the techniques to deal with that, you know, I’ve had training through work, I’ve been a mental health first aider, and that’s, you know been a massive help to kind of understand a bit more about how to support people, and you know, signpost people in the right direction, but generally just being in a kind of much more, in much better control of my own mental health, and physical and sexual health is, it just puts me in a much better place to be able to kind of speak to people and, you know, as much as kind of sometimes talking about, you know, my own experiences can be a bit of a traumatic event, and kind of, you know, bring up those kind of old feelings, you know, kind of knowing what I do now, and you know having been through that, I feel like in a much stronger place to be able to support people, you know talk them through with the reality of it.

KARL
So look, everyone’s journey’s different, but what are your sort of your initial advice, if someone is newly diagnosed, what would you say to that person, and again, everyone’s journey’s different, everyone’s circumstances are different, but what are a couple of sort of key takeaways that you’ve learned over the past 11 years, that you think would be really helpful for somebody in that newly diagnosed position to hear?

MATT
I think firstly it’s just to kind of take your time, it’s a big piece of news, just kind of take your time, and understand it as much as you can, you know, read about the reality, you know, read online, and read the, you know, when I got diagnosed, I got given like this massive like bag of books to read, so I kind of read through all that, and that kind of gave me all the knowledge, and understanding that I needed to start kind of moving forward. I think speaking to people is super important, I think it’s really important to be able to speak to close people, family, friends, you know, people that you know, you are confident in speaking to, and just kind of, you know, sharing that your experiences, and kind of how you’re feeling. And you know, likewise, you know, social media is massive for all of, you know, advocates online, so I think that’s also a good place to kind of start to look, as well.

KARL
Yeah, well we are grateful that there are people like you, Matt Webster out there, that newly diagnosed people can slide into your DMs, and reach out to you, because —

Absolutely. Because the lived experience is really helpful, and sometimes the anonymous nature of it, the fact that we don’t know each other, sometimes actually makes it I think, easier to share these stories with someone. Right?

MATT
Yeah, absolutely. I completely agree. It was, I think when I spoke to a friend of mine, you know, quite close to being diagnosed, I was … Yeah, I was really scared to actually talk to this person, ’cause I knew him, he was, you know, friends with my ex, and it was quite scary to kind of, you know, start saying these things even though he was, you know, positive, as well, I think it was still quite challenging, so being able to speak to someone who, you know, in an anonymous way does help a lot, and there’s obviously a lot of charities out there that can, you know, provide the same, you know, same experience as well.

KARL
Yeah, well, Matt Webster, good talking to you. We’ll put all your social media information up in the post below, so that people can see this, and if they want, they can slide into your DMs, and that’s why we here —

MATT
Absolutely.

KARL
at +Life exist, as well. Matt, thank you for your time.

MATT
Thank you so much, guys, for being on.

KARL
Absolutely, that’s gonna do it for this episode of +TALKT, If you want more information about us or Matt, check out our website pluslifemedia.com, and remember, you can follow us across social media platforms, we are @PlusLifeMedia. Until next time, be nice, smile, wash your hands, and all the usual stuff. See you next time.